Are You Happy Now?
by LJ4Neal
Summary: KELNEAL... song fic featuring 'Are You Happy Now'... Kel thought she was over cleon... yet how will she react when she's introduced to his betrothed? And who will she turn to? A certain MARRIED meathead perhaps?


Well, it is that time again. Yup, you gessed it. That time when LJ has suddenly decided to spontaneously write a big giant slice of fluff. Oh, and angst of course, because what would we all do without the two of them huh? haha... Well, I wouldn't be able to live without it, that's for sure. Although, angst in real life would kind of suck, but the fluff wouldn't. But anyways, that's not the point. The point is that this is me taking a new approach for once, because in the beginning, and for the majority of it all, it is actually all Cleon-dominated. Yes, that's right, I have written a fic that is mainly dominated with a lot of a character that I solemnly believe is a waste of space and complete and total trash (but only because he gets in the way of Neal and Kel getting together, plus steals her affections in squire).

But, it's all good in the end, you'll see... I am actually considering making this an actual story story... songfic story thing... if enough people like it... hahah... DD... Feed back would be good please. Thank you to all... hehehe... and make sure to tell me if you want more! grin

Please review! Luv you all, LJ4Neal

Oh yeh, and everyone JOIN MY COMMUNITY!!!!!!!! Called 'Sir Nealan Rox my Sox'!!!!!!! it's in my profile under communities! I would put the link, but fanfiction wont lemme!

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**Are You Happy Now?**

**Now, don't just walk away**

_"I'm sorry Kel. I just can't be with you. I have an obligation to my home. I'm going to be married in 3 months". _Cleon's voice echoed through her mind as she remembered what he'd said to her the last time she had seen him. How he'd just walked away, never giving her a second glance again, even though when she looked into his eyes she could still see desire and sorrow in them. She looked up, and could see that Cleon and someone else was walking towards her now.

  
Pretending everything's ok  
And you don't care about me

"Kel, meet Ermelian, my newly betrothed", Cleon said, smiling at her. Kel inspected his face and saw that his smile didn't reach his eyes and was strained. He was concentrating intently on her eyebrows, trying to fool everyone into thinking that he was looking at her in the eyes. Kel stared back at him, her own eyes cold and hostile. If Cleon was going to act like everything was fine and that they'd never been anything more than acquaintances, then two could play at that game.

  
And I know there's just no use  
When all your lies become your truths and I don't care... yeah, yeah, yeah

"Hi! It's nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you!" The raven haired beauty before her said graciously, curtseying delicately. Kel smiled warmly, even though she could feel her heart freezing to ice. She curtseyed clumsily, she never learnt how to curtsey properly, and it looked even more odd coming from a fairly built, muscular and tall figure such as herself dressed in breeches.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too" Kel replied, her voice was falsely cheerful and Cleon flinched upon hearing the tone. He knew Kel way too well to know that her tone was genuine. Kel looked at Ermelian, if the girl beside him had noticed his facial expression, she did not indicate it and instead asked politely "Do you to know each other very well?"

"Umm... No, not really. I was a year older than Kel in terms of page training, so we were just... friendly acquaintances" Cleon lied. At this, Kel suddenly turned her gaze on him sharply. She had expected him to at **least** acknowledge that they had been at least **good **friends, or even the truth that they had been more than just friends when they were squires. She inspected his face inch by inch. She used to know him so well, what he said was such a blatant lie. And yet, as she looked up into his face, it seemed that the lie had become a truth, because all of a sudden she realized how much she had changed. Right now, in real life, she didn't know him very much at all.

  
Could you look me in the eye  
And tell me that you're happy now, ohhh, ohhh

**Would you tell it to my face or have I been erased,  
Are you happy now?  
Are you happy now? **

"Yeah, Cleon and me were just in the same group of friends, but we never really got a chance to know each other that well" She said coldly, staring him at the eye. She saw a pained expression flit across his face. _Are you happy now? _She asked him silently. She dared him to disagree, and to tell the truth. But he just nodded and looked away from her and looked back to Ermelian to see if she had realised if anything was strained. Kel could almost see every single thought that ran through his head, Cleon had never been very good at hiding his emotions.

"Oh, that's a pity. You could have helped the big oaf to learn a thing or two about girls. This fellow's been surrounded by men for so long his habits are positively disgusting!" Ermelian exclaimed humorously. Relief washed over his face, she still hadn't realised how strained everything that the both of them said seemed to be. It seemed as if her entire history with him, every moment that they had together had been erased from his memory- she no longer existed within his mind.

**You took all there was to take,  
And left me with an empty plate **

Her mind felt numb as she laughed, and it was so fake that it reminded her of the brainless court ladies that flapped a pretty fan in their face and giggled whilst flirting with any half-good looking male specimen.

"Yes, it is a pity isn't it?" She asked in agreement. This, was the only thing that was even remotely true. But of course, it was the other way around, because it was a pity that they had actually become more than friends. Cleon had given her her first kiss, and she had given him her love. And it had all been wasted away, because at this moment in time, looking at the dainty creature in front of her latched onto the arm that once owned a part of her heart, she felt empty and lifeless.

  
And you don't care about it, yeah

"It's alright though I guess, I'll just have to teach him myself" She said, and giggled at herself. She seemed like a perky sort, but her optimism made Kel want to puke. During this entire exchange, Cleon had just stayed silent, his eyes looking at everything except for Kel. She stared him in the eye once more, challenging him again. He couldn't help but look at her back, he had always been even worse at avoiding her gaze than hiding his emotions. But when she looked into them, they were cold and hard. He didn't care anymore.

  
And I, I've given up this game  
I'm leaving you with all the blame cause I don't care, yeah, yeah yeah

She turned away from her and grinned at his betrothed.

"That's fine with me, I wouldn't have it any other way! What more could a man ask for?" He said affectionately. Again, Kel could hear the underlying tone of deceit. A surge of anger broke through her emotionless mask, and Kel felt a thirst for revenge. If he was going to continue on with his petty facade, then so be it. She could have him. But she would get the last word.

  
Could you look me in the eye?  
And tell me that you're happy now, oohh oohhh

**Would you tell it to my face or have I been erased,  
Are you happy now? Ohhh, ohhhh  
Are you happy now?**

"Fine, Whatever Cleon. Go ahead and let your wife think that there's never been anyone before her. I can't believe you," She said, the hostility was cold enough to freeze all of Tortall over. She deftly turned herself away and walked away from him, trying her best to keep herself from breaking down. During that moment, she felt like her life was in slow motion, as her mind barely registered someone calling her name behind her. She kept on walking, a lone tear ran down her face from the corner of her right eye.

She felt a pair of warm, large hand's grasp her shoulder's firmly to prevent her from going any further. Kel stopped in her tracks, but didn't turn around.

"Kel, please just listen to me," Cleon's voice was hoarse with emotion. She shut her eyes and waited.

  
Do you really have everything you want?  
You can't ever give me something you ain't got  
You can't run away from yourself

"I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry," he started, as he walked around her to face her. He lifted her chin up with his right hand, the other cupping cheek. She opened her eyes, and looked into his. He too, had tears running down his face now.

"I just thought that it'd be easier for both you and me if we just forgot. If we just pretended that it never happened" He said. She knew that he meant what he said, that he actually believed that it would be easier. She knew that he was sorry with all his heart. But she also knew that whatever happens, he just wasn't going to come back to her.

"Well, you were wrong. You can't pretend that nothing ever happened between us. You can't run away from the past," she told him. She looked away. An overwhelming sense of grief enveloped her as she lifted his hands from her. She scanned his face one last time and put her hands on his shoulders. Leaning in, she pecked him lightly on the cheek and released him.

  
Could you look me in the eye?  
and tell me that you're happy now, oohh oohhh  
come on tell it to my face or have I been erased,  
are you happy now? Ohhh, ohhhh  
are you happy now?

"Goodbye Cleon" She said finally, and walked away again. This time, he knew not to follow, and Kel could feel his intense gaze on her back as she continued to turn a corridor. Once she was out of his sight, she ran as fast as she could, the tears were flowing free now. This would be the last time she would cry over him. This would be the last time that she would LET herself cry over him. She ran blindly, turning corners, not knowing where she was planning on going. Anywhere that was away from him was good enough for her.

**  
Would you look me in the eye?  
Could you look me in the eye?**

She stopped at a door and blinked at it. It was familiar for some reason. Some of the senses in her mind came back, and she realized where she was.

Kel knocked on the door, her hard raps in quick succession. Stopping and waiting, she heard rustling as a weary and tired looking Neal appeared at the door. A small part of her couldn't help smiling a little. It was just like Neal to still be sleeping in the middle of the day. He looked at her dazed, until her realised who she was.

"Kel?" a surprised Neal asked, his mind was still processing his thoughts. He looked at her face properly and his eyes widened with concern. It wasn't often that Kel cried, in fact, he'd never seen her cry at all during their entire training together. His faced creased in worry.

  
I've had that all I can take  
I'm not about to break

"Neal... I need you" She managed to say simply. He nodded and wrapped his arms around her, enveloping her into a tight hug, his face buried into her hair. She dug her face into his chest and sobbed openly into his tight embrace. This was what she needed right now. She could always count on Neal through it all.

**Cause I'm happy now**

"Ssshhh Kel, it's alright. Everything will be OK" Neal said gently into her hair. Somehow, he comforted her, and Kel thought for a second that maybe things would be all right in the end. Just maybe.

  
Are you happy now?


End file.
